Detroit, MI – The meteor that landed in the Detroit area Tuesday night has come forward to ask that it be allowed to enter Canada under the Immigration and Refugee Act.  “I honestly thought I was going to land in Leamington but somehow my GPS got me turned around and I landed in Clarkston, Michigan” the meteor said on Thursday.
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Windsor, ON – An exceptionally long pubic hair appeared at a local establishment’s men’s room urinal this past Saturday startling many customers and employees. “It wasn’t there when I started work” bartender, Kyle Banner reported “I would remember seeing something like that”.   Investigators estimate the hair was left sometime between 6:00pm and 9:00pm.
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Windsor, ON – The intersection of Walker Road and Ottawa Street somehow  repeatedly confuses drivers in the Windsor area.   When headed north towards Wyandotte Street while traveling on Walker Road motorists encounter a left-turn lane to Ottawa Street but nearly 30% of drivers proceed straight even though they are in the turning lane.
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Windsor, ON – Wayne Marcus, aged 38, of Windsor has spent the Christmas holidays trying to decide whether he should reply to a Christmas card he received from an ex-girlfriend this year. “Her card arrived on December 24^th and I didn’t think I’d ever get a card from her again.  We had an ugly break-up” Marcus explained on Wednesday.
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Windsor, ON – Local sign-maker, Peter Yates, of Windsor has seen a dramatic decrease in sales this year with his signature product the No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service sign. “It seems nobody wants them anymore.   There was a time when every bar, restaurant and convenience store in Windsor had one of my signs” Yates said on Thursday.
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Windsor, ON – The Kiss-cam a long time feature at sporting events where the arena cameraman pans around to find a couple sitting together then puts the image on the big-screen over centre ice that encourages them to kiss is being replaced by a new feature, the Public-Break-Up-cam.
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