Giant Bong to replace Giant Tomato as Leamington is re-branded Cannabis Capital of Canada

Leamington, ON – In effort to revitalize tourism in Essex County the Ontario Bureau of Tourism announced plans on Wednesday to re-brand Leamington as the new “Cannabis Capital of Canada”.   Leamington has previously been known as the Sun Parlour of Canada and the Tomato Capital Canada but with rapidly expanding marijuana industry taking over the area the Bureau of Tourism felt the time was right for a change.
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Extraordinarily long hair at urinal startles bar patrons

Windsor, ON – An exceptionally long pubic hair appeared at a local establishment’s men’s room urinal this past Saturday startling many customers and employees. “It wasn’t there when I started work” bartender, Kyle Banner reported “I would remember seeing something like that”.   Investigators estimate the hair was left sometime between 6:00pm and 9:00pm.
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