Windsor, ON – Swimming Canada announced today that the Windsor International Aquatic Centre would be prohibited from hosting events after a recent shark sighting in the pool. “We understand the city is working on the previously identified problem with the currents in the outer lanes but the shark issue will also need to be addressed” said spokesperson Catherine Mead.
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Monthly Archives: May 2018
Very-angry emoji replaces red-face-angry emoji as local man’s go-to emoji
Windsor, ON – Local man Daniel Burch, age 41 of Windsor, has stopped using his favourite emoji and replaced it with a more aggressive emoji “I was using the red-face-angry emoji all the time but I recently discovered the very-angry emoji and I think the very-angry emoji better reflects my personality and overall outlook on life”.
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Local dog running for MPP in Windsor-West
Windsor, ON – The Windsor-West riding has a new contender who is making gains on the pack in his bid to become a first time member of provincial parliament. Travis T. Dog is a long-time resident of Windsor “In dog years I’ve lived in the city for 56 years but this is the first time I have considered running for political office”. The newly announced candidate has seen a spike in recent polling after his acclimation to be the candidate for the Canine Party “I think people are fed up with the status quo and are looking for a change”.
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Filing complaints with Integrity Commissioner latest fad sweeping the city
Windsor, ON – Following in a long-line of popular fads to hit the Rose City including dancing Gangham Style, collecting Beanie Babies and owning a water-bed the latest cultural phenomenon has hit Windsor: filing a complaint with the integrity commissioner.
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New autonomous vehicles coming to Windsor
Windsor, ON – With the announcement this week that Windsor has been selected as a future test-market for driverless cars in Canada plans are already underway to have the vehicles programmed to behave just like drivers in the Windsor area.
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