Picture frames hit two-year mark of waiting to be hung on wall

Windsor, ON – Nick Cross, age 38, of Windsor, Ontario has recently reached a milestone of a home renovation project as the picture frames sitting in his living room have yet to be hung on the wall after two years.  “I’ve been meaning to get around to that but just haven’t had the time” Mr. Cross said on Tuesday morning.

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Windsor man disappointed that Doug Ford hasn’t called him once since election

Windsor, ON – Nick Henderson, age 48 of Windsor, has had the same disappointment every day when returning home from work since June 2nd that being he has not received a voice mail message from Premier Doug Ford.  “I don’t get it.   He called me three times before the election.   Left me a very nice voice mail message each time and told me I was his friend and now nothing” an agitated Mr. Henderson reported on Tuesday.

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Christmas lawn ornaments starting to think they’ll be out here all year

Windsor, ON – A group of lawn ornaments in South Windsor are expressing concern that they will be left outside for the rest of 2022.   “I was pretty sure they’d take us down before Easter but here we are on the verge of the month of May and we’re right here on the front lawn” said a clearly distressed Snowman on Saturday.

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Top Ten Bar Band Names that look bad on a Marquee

As bars and nightclubs in Windsor come back to full capacity and live music makes it return to the city several new bands that have formed over the last two years are now planning their first shows. Counting down from ten to one here’s a list of bar band names that aspiring musicians should reconsider using as they just don’t look good on a marquee:

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Hoarding of Taco Bell sauce packets may finally pay off

Windsor, ON –  In one of the happiest moments of his life Trevor Buchman, age 38, of Windsor, Ontario proudly displayed his collection of Taco Bell packets to gathered media this week.  “Truly this is one of the proudest moments of my life.  I always ask for and keep extra sauce packets every time I go thru the drive-thru.  I’ve got them all, Taco Bell, Arby’s, Wendy’s and now that there are supply chain issues and mild-flavoured taco sauce isn’t available I am the only one with inventory” Mr. Buchman announced on Tuesday.

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