Windsor, ON – Sitting quietly in the fruits and vegetables section of a local grocery a Jumbo-Cabbage reports he has gained a significant amount of weight since the summer. “I stopped going to the gym and developed some poor nutritional habits but I thought I could drop the excess weight by getting back into exercising but the results aren’t there so far” the Cabbage said on Wednesday.
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Windsor, ON – The annual phenomenon of Windsor drivers being hit with a mass amnesia and forgetting how to drive in snow has again overwhelmed a majority of motorists in the Windsor area.
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Windsor, ON – Recently sentenced to two weeks in jail for several unpaid parking tickets local inmate Jeremy Douglas was upset to learn that he will be spending an extra hour in jail this weekend ahead of his release on Monday.
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Windsor, ON – Only one week after Canada became the first country to legalize marijuana jokes about weed have stopped appearing on social media. “The first few days were awesome” said local marijuana joke-teller Caleb Richards “the jokes were everywhere. We had stuff about clouds of weed-smoke covering Canada on weather maps and all the Doritos jokes. Now there is nothing”.
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Windsor, ON – Darlene Davis, 39, of Windsor has been commenting daily on multiple Windsor Star stories on-line for several years but realized this past weekend that every comment or idea she has posted has probably been wrong. “I feel kind of stupid” Ms. Davis said on Tuesday.
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Windsor, ON – After a recent poll taken in the Walkerville area Whats Up Windsor can report a virtual dead-heat in this year’s mayoral race. Five people having after-work-beverages the Walkerville Tavern last Friday participated in this poll and were asked which candidate was their preference in the mayoral race.
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