Windsor, ON – Peter Brock, age 44, of Windsor announced on his weekly Zoom video-conference with extended family and friends that he would finally be opening the package of toilet paper he purchased on March 11th. “I’m pretty excited about this. My over-reacting and hoarding is finally going to pay off!” Mr. Brock said on Saturday.
He explained further “I know some people think it was a dumb thing to do but it is two months later and I don’t have to go to the store to buy toilet paper. In fact I may not have to buy toilet paper until next year. I’ve got this 48 pack not opened and another 48 pack in the closet downstairs. I might be good until 2022. So who is the dumb one now?”
When asked what he would purchase on his next trip to the store Mr. Brock advised that he has a priority item on his shopping list “I’m going to get as many cans of Raid bug-spray as I can so when the murder hornets arrive I’ll be able to fight back”.