Top 10 things to carry in your pants besides a hatchet

Windsor, ON – With this week’s arrest of a man in Jackson Park for carrying a hatchet in his pants What’s Up Windsor is providing a list of the top-ten things to carry in your pants instead of a hatchet.   Counting down from ten to one here’s some ideas on what you can carry in your pants while visiting a park in Windsor, Ontario.

10. Pizza (Windsor is known for its pizza so why not have an extra slice in your pants)

9. Marijuana (its legal now)

8. Doritos (for after the marijuana)

7. Paperwork for filing for a complaint with the Integrity Commissioner (everyone else is doing it why not you?)

6. Smart Phone (so you can check your favourite parody news website)

5. Canada World Cup soccer flag (please note: you’ll have to keep it inside your pants until 2026)

4. Timbits (who doesn’t love a Timbit? But don’t get the plain ones they’re awful)

3. Mayoral nomination papers (you could end up with control of Jackson Park for four years)

2. Tickets for Trevor Noah (he’s doing a show at the Casino on July 20th)

1. Wallet (especially handy if you have to show police your I.D. because you also have a hatchet in your pants)